Fresh Start

Listen. It's Important. I have always worked with imaginative and smart people. People who care about the world around them, the lives they touch, the work they take on. I have seen people take a menial task and work hard to make it something more. I have also seen what happens when their questions, moments of creativity, and reaching outside of the box are met with skepticism and critique. We are quick to jump on things that require more of us or change our status quo- but why?  I was lucky to have been met with people who embraced my questions and interest in learning more. I used to be so scared of answering phones at my first job, so scared of excel at my second, so anxious about public speaking in others and the list goes on and on. Luckily, I was met with opportunities to gain exposure and experience. That is what allowed me to understand how things process and how capable I was. It provided me with a broader conception of how things could be.  Although I am writi...

I have big feelings.  Sometimes little passing ones, but other times big ones that grow and flood into one another. I cope and I manage, but it's something very true to who I am. Some of these big feelings are beautiful and iridescent. Others are heavy and all consuming. And sometimes I feel ashamed and sometimes I even apologize. "I'm sorry I am feeling things so strongly, I'm sorry if my emotions cause you discomfort, I'm sorry if I am too much to handle right now."- I try to think out loud of what people would actually respond with if these words left my mouth. But they echo in my mind. Similarly, these posts on this blog are heavy. I get nervous to share aspects of them- even if I wind up being the only one who reads it. But they are true and accurate reflections of my thoughts. And at the end of the day I am proud of them. The past several years, I have truly seen people in very personal and raw moments- more than I ever had before. Moments of...

Our minds are crazy ............ Thanks to evolution we have something hardwired called a negativity bias- meaning that we are likely to be hyper critical of ourselves. (Great right?) Although harsh self criticisms are bound to happen in life one of the ways out of this conundrum is to encourage self-compassion. “Research shows that the No. 1 barrier to self-compassion is fear of being complacent and losing your edge,” Dr. Neff said. “And all the research shows that’s not true. It’s just the opposite,” meaning that self-compassion can lead to greater achievement than self-criticism ever could.    - Click to read this NYTimes article for more! I decided the other day, to myself, that I want to work on actively forgiving myself. The goal was that with each inevitable self critique- I will forgive and let go. I would consistently encourage myself to think compassionately. My inner dialogue: I want to forgive myself for being vulnerable and messy. For being unpoetic an...

BIGGEST lesson of this year so far: Looking for a sign, is a sign.  Paying attention to not only our actions, but acknowledging our internal dialogue is everything . I feel that there is a power in learning to trust ourselves and our intuition, but that this capability is developed over time. This year- more than any other- I have been asked a lot about myself. What are your dreams & goals? How would you describe yourself? What do you want to do? And I have found myself overwhelmed with the fact that I. Don't. Know.  So my plan is to start with the simple stuff and say- I don't need any answers or to provide any validation to live my life.  My dreams and goals consist of being happy and being surrounded by energizing and positive people.  I would describe myself as kind, hard working, silly, and open to growth.  What do I want to do? I want to allow myself the energy and time to consider the things in life that give me meaning and joy.  ...